[96] Uniform

[96]

Why do we have to
All be the same?
Why do we have to
Be part of this?
Aren’t we stronger
Adding to a whole
As individuals?

I pulled away,
Thinking I could
Do this on my own!
I pulled away,
Jumped from the edge,
Knowing I could fly.

The flock staring down
For a moment or two,
And then not minding again
As I was now an alien
Falling from their nurture.

You’re fading.
You’re fading.
You’re
Gone.

I have to make this work now.
Where am I falling?
Where

Am
I

Falling?

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[36] Thirty-Six Days

[36].png

I didn’t want to let go.
I wanted to stay holding on.
I’ve been trying so hard
And despite getting so far
Trying to make this for you,
I can never be more than me.

She stayed up through the night
And I always ask if I’m a burden
And I know she loves me
And I know she doesn’t think that
And I think I only ask that
Because I’m asking myself.

Can I handle the weight
Of pushing myself further?
7 days too late becomes more
Because I lack the strength
No matter my rationality,
There’s still so much pain.

Now time to work, but
On the project or myself?
I know you aren’t dissapointed.
You’d rather me be okay,
And work on my own hexis.
Why can’t I accept that?

Why don’t I want to let go!?
I have to get this done.
I have to finish what I started.
I can’t give up now, but…
They’re all telling me how much
I’m burning myself out.

We were side by side today
Regardless of my crazy hurt,
And I love you so much,
And I live to be a part.
I remember how happy you make me;
That’s what I have to hold onto.

Crimson Reflection

She didn’t realize
How much
Everything hurt
Until the blood
Was everywhere
And she was trying
To stop it
But it just kept
Coming on
Just like him
Just like him
He kept
Coming on
Even
If it
Was
Years
Ago
She
Still
Felt
Him
Coming on.

Crimson drops,
Streaming down,
Frantic heart,
Useless tears,
A promise
To herself
That she knows
She will break
To never do this
Again.

She tells herself, one last time,
How she’ll never feel love again.
Not because no one loves her,
But because she could never open up like that
To anyone
Ever again.