All in Probability and Chances

Growing stronger, more able.

More opportunity, life stable.

Then, why do I feel like falling apart?

Stupid, faithless, ignorant heart…

I pick apart your words all the while,

I’m the only one to whom you never smile.

Sorry if I am such a disgrace,

Or simply wasted space.

Falling or failing, with slacking fortification.

Stumbling ideas, and I’m lacking coordination.

I know that you lied, I was there when you cried,

So hard for you I tried, so why can’t you decide?

I don’t ask for anything more anymore.

You can never be her, what are you trying for?

Asking you, like all the rest, to stay safe and sound.

But, honestly, I know you’ll never stay around…


2 thoughts on “All in Probability and Chances

  1. I understand. Everything. Do not underestimate me. I am peaceful, not passive. All our souls have chosen to honor difficult paths that do intersect, Kaprekar, and it’s OK if our inadequacies collide sometimes creating misunderstandings; the deep feelings are never gone, despite all appearances.
    If I can’t stay around, no one is to blame but the unbelievable chaos that is breaking out in our country. I will be lovingly thinking of you and praying for you to be strong yourself. ~<3~ Leon

    Liked by 1 person

    • Please, do not worry that you have wronged me in any way– There are many perspectives, so many sides, to every story… it’s never as simple as one ever initially believes.

      You are so dearly supportive; and I hope you do know how much I admire that! Things are so ever-changing and dramatically complicated with us all, as I’m sure you understand… so, please don’t ever think I’m directing any frustration at you. It’s all stories, all different people and perspectives, and ever-changing meaning.

      I am sorry I do not reply much. It is not to ignore you. I just have trouble finding the words to say things the way I want to. Ah, gosh, right now I feel like I’ve said this all before, but I think you understand. I trust that you do.

      Just understand that you are deeply important to me as you have always been, dear brother.



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